It's so funny, you'll kill yourself laughing!
Friday, November 19th, 2004 02:06 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
basildestinyI watched The Cell finally. I hate those psychological thrillers. I hate them because they're really awesome and I really adore them, but I feel like a sick freak for liking them so much. The ending is totally lame...or totally enigmatic! I say Katherine has Carl in her brain and he takes over Edward and starts all over! Woohoo! It's just like the Ring only more sick and twisted.
My mom's brother died. She's pretty sad about it all because she's been so busy with her own life that she never got a chance to visit with him. His health has been detioriating for a while. I'm pretty sad about it for her. I know what it's like to lose a brother. It's sad that I never even got to know him and that he was pretty destitute in his final years.
I think that maybe this is my problem. I'm too honest all of the time. And I open myself up all the time. I'm not afraid of getting hurt. I know getting hurt is inevitable. On occassion I lash out or react to the pain, but I can't stop myself. I want to show the world that it is ok to trust and be honest and care. But it gets me nowhere.
Could I be frustrated from lack of psychoanalysis in my life? I had a crappy phone call at work today and I couldn't even let myself vent to my supervisor! I just didn't want to force him to hear my rantings about some stupid phone call. Who cares? It was just a call. But I just had to shout about it or it was going to ruin the rest of my day. And yet I had to force myself to say what was bothering me even after my supervisor says that I should vent to him because that's his job! I can open myself up for the whole to see, poke, prod, and dissect, but I can't trust someone else to share my pain? Of course I can't trust someone to share my pain. Who would want to share my pain? Who has ever said "Hey! Throw your pain on me?" Very, very few people who I hold very dear. I usually get the ol' "waiting for my turn to speak" conversation or the good ol' "Hugs!! Chin up! Life's grand!" conversation.
Of course life is grand, but we no longer validate hard times? How would we be able to define grand times without the hard times? Is it really so difficult to nod your head and say "Yes, I acknowledge your frustration." I was venting to my supervisor and he reminded me of something important today. Sometimes we just have to vent. And if I don't need help and just want to vent, that's all I have to say. He won't give advice if I know what to do. My jaw hits the ground that people still do that. And it just reaffirms my belief that US Cellular rocks! Too bad the whole call center is going through a shift change and I may lose yet another coach. I'm quite down hearted about it all. I was getting adjusted to my team and my coach and there's a chance that it could all change. Sure, nothing remains the same, but if things constantly change how am I to learn?
Hector was the first of the gang with a gun in a his hand, the first to do time, the first of the gang to die!
~Bas/J Dawg
My mom's brother died. She's pretty sad about it all because she's been so busy with her own life that she never got a chance to visit with him. His health has been detioriating for a while. I'm pretty sad about it for her. I know what it's like to lose a brother. It's sad that I never even got to know him and that he was pretty destitute in his final years.
I think that maybe this is my problem. I'm too honest all of the time. And I open myself up all the time. I'm not afraid of getting hurt. I know getting hurt is inevitable. On occassion I lash out or react to the pain, but I can't stop myself. I want to show the world that it is ok to trust and be honest and care. But it gets me nowhere.
Could I be frustrated from lack of psychoanalysis in my life? I had a crappy phone call at work today and I couldn't even let myself vent to my supervisor! I just didn't want to force him to hear my rantings about some stupid phone call. Who cares? It was just a call. But I just had to shout about it or it was going to ruin the rest of my day. And yet I had to force myself to say what was bothering me even after my supervisor says that I should vent to him because that's his job! I can open myself up for the whole to see, poke, prod, and dissect, but I can't trust someone else to share my pain? Of course I can't trust someone to share my pain. Who would want to share my pain? Who has ever said "Hey! Throw your pain on me?" Very, very few people who I hold very dear. I usually get the ol' "waiting for my turn to speak" conversation or the good ol' "Hugs!! Chin up! Life's grand!" conversation.
Of course life is grand, but we no longer validate hard times? How would we be able to define grand times without the hard times? Is it really so difficult to nod your head and say "Yes, I acknowledge your frustration." I was venting to my supervisor and he reminded me of something important today. Sometimes we just have to vent. And if I don't need help and just want to vent, that's all I have to say. He won't give advice if I know what to do. My jaw hits the ground that people still do that. And it just reaffirms my belief that US Cellular rocks! Too bad the whole call center is going through a shift change and I may lose yet another coach. I'm quite down hearted about it all. I was getting adjusted to my team and my coach and there's a chance that it could all change. Sure, nothing remains the same, but if things constantly change how am I to learn?
Hector was the first of the gang with a gun in a his hand, the first to do time, the first of the gang to die!
~Bas/J Dawg
