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"Taking me out of my comfort zone"
Sunday, July 1st, 2007 02:53 pmI keep finding that phrase applying to all sorts of situations I'm in. I really feel that is what God is doing in my life right now.
I was thinking about it last night (while I should have been sleeping, of course!). Well I'll start at the beginning first. A friend of mine recently went on a mission trip to Costa Rica. I was reading over his travel notes/journaling. He shared his testimony, his story of what had brought him to where he is, and he'd also witnessed to some people on the streets. That is something I totally uncomfortable doing. I was just thinking what courage that would have taken to even sign up on the trip much less share as much as he shared. He talked about a lot of things that were outside of his comfort zone, but that he had faith that God would provide what he would need. This really struck home for me. With this new job, I am totally out of my comfort zone. I have been really stressed, as you've read in my entries this week.
I'm reading "Lead Like Jesus" which talks about different leadership roles. Normally, I'll be the first to admit that I am not a good leader. I used to feel that I could lead, if no one else took up the reins, I do it. But since getting married, I've lost that confidence and feel that I am horrible leader compared to my husband and his family. They all have leadership qualities. I've convinced myself that I am not leadership material. In reading this book, I realized that everyone leads. At some point, you give advice to someone else. You have kids. You live by yourself and take care of yourself. It's all leadership. Not to mention, I have been in leadership positions in previous jobs. So I've been trying to keep God as my focus. And to use Jesus as my leadership role model. I'm not very far into the book so far though so not a lot of practice at this yet.
Then today's sermon started a new series. It's called Facing Your Giants. Today's giant was pride. Pride is something we all can relate to doing. But I know that I am guilty of it without a doubt. I can be extremely critical, especially while playing WoW. I'll make all sorts of unneccessary comments. However, the biggest thing for me when it comes to pride is NOT wanting to leave my comfort zone. I don't want change. I don't want to look foolish. I'm so nervous about this job because I don't know the first thing about a lot of it. And I find myself unwilling to take a leap of faith that a) I will get the training that I need and b) the world won't end if I make a mistake!
So last night I was sitting up, thinking about getting outside of my comfort zone. I'm ready to be challenged to move out of that zone more. I realized that without moving out of my comfort zone, I will never learn anything new. I won't grow. Moreover, I can either decide to move out of my comfort zone on my own, or I can wait for God to move me out of my comfort zone. Which honestly, he had to do it when it came to this new job anyway. I was looking, but I wasn't doggedly calling these people back. I was resigned to say "Well they need to call ME back. I don't want to overstay my welcome or harrass the HR people." But our financial situation suddenly became extremely dire and I knew I had to get a job or we were going to sink. (Oddly, the same day that I went for my second interview, our financial situation righted itself. It turned out that I'd made a bookkeeping error, entered our cable payment twice, as well as entered some bills that we'd paid off or to which we'd cancelled our subscription.) I'm still nervous. I still feel uneasy. I just... I've had my grandfather on my mind a lot lately. I'm sure I've said it, but he retired from the Air Force and went from Senior Master Sergeant advising a two-star general to the rookie cop when he was 40! Not only that, but he retired as police chief 16 years after that. He was constantly taking me outside of my comfort zone when my brother and I would visit in the summers as we were growing up. We weren't allowed to sit inside all day and watch TV.
I'd never had a scooter, but they bought us each one so we learned to ride. Let me just say that bike riding and scooter riding is so much more fun in Florida than in Tennessee. Although the hills can be fun to ride down, riding up isn't as much fun. And just so many other things. So many things that adults in your life teach you as a child. I want to go back in time a little bit and learn to handle challenges and getting outside of my comfort zone again. It was so much like that during the school years. Every year a new teacher, new subjects. And I excelled at that. I think that's why the school teacher in our training class is so confident. She's in her element when she's faced with change.
I'm rambling at this point. Just kind of throwing thoughts out there as they come to mind. I'm not so good at this conclusions. I guess because the conclusion isn't written. These are my goals. I want to challenge myself more. I want to grow. I especially want to grow and move in a direction toward becoming the person God has in mind for me to be. So we'll see how this goes. I am on a good start. Time for the follow through.
Time to go mark my catalog books for work!
~Jay
ETA I'll start by making an entry that talks about God as a public entry. I usually make these really personal entries friends only. I don't want to offend people and I know that a lot of people think I'm some crazy ultra conservative, maybe even a neo-con, who went all religious. A) I know I'm not. B) Even though I have had a lot of confrontations (and at this point it is nearly 3 years after the fact), I am always surprised by the confrontations C) It's time to stop being Peter in denial and to step out of my comfort zone and say "I am a Christ follower." If you have to unfriend me, I'll understand. I just have to stop trying to hide who I am. I am extremely guilty of going with the crowd when it comes to speaking out of turn. I won't jump off the bridge, but I have been known to say idiotic things just to look cool. Another thing my book is reminding me is that I don't have to worry about impressing anyone other than God. He's the only one I should be worried about impressing. And the provider will give me everything that I need to complete my work.
I was thinking about it last night (while I should have been sleeping, of course!). Well I'll start at the beginning first. A friend of mine recently went on a mission trip to Costa Rica. I was reading over his travel notes/journaling. He shared his testimony, his story of what had brought him to where he is, and he'd also witnessed to some people on the streets. That is something I totally uncomfortable doing. I was just thinking what courage that would have taken to even sign up on the trip much less share as much as he shared. He talked about a lot of things that were outside of his comfort zone, but that he had faith that God would provide what he would need. This really struck home for me. With this new job, I am totally out of my comfort zone. I have been really stressed, as you've read in my entries this week.
I'm reading "Lead Like Jesus" which talks about different leadership roles. Normally, I'll be the first to admit that I am not a good leader. I used to feel that I could lead, if no one else took up the reins, I do it. But since getting married, I've lost that confidence and feel that I am horrible leader compared to my husband and his family. They all have leadership qualities. I've convinced myself that I am not leadership material. In reading this book, I realized that everyone leads. At some point, you give advice to someone else. You have kids. You live by yourself and take care of yourself. It's all leadership. Not to mention, I have been in leadership positions in previous jobs. So I've been trying to keep God as my focus. And to use Jesus as my leadership role model. I'm not very far into the book so far though so not a lot of practice at this yet.
Then today's sermon started a new series. It's called Facing Your Giants. Today's giant was pride. Pride is something we all can relate to doing. But I know that I am guilty of it without a doubt. I can be extremely critical, especially while playing WoW. I'll make all sorts of unneccessary comments. However, the biggest thing for me when it comes to pride is NOT wanting to leave my comfort zone. I don't want change. I don't want to look foolish. I'm so nervous about this job because I don't know the first thing about a lot of it. And I find myself unwilling to take a leap of faith that a) I will get the training that I need and b) the world won't end if I make a mistake!
So last night I was sitting up, thinking about getting outside of my comfort zone. I'm ready to be challenged to move out of that zone more. I realized that without moving out of my comfort zone, I will never learn anything new. I won't grow. Moreover, I can either decide to move out of my comfort zone on my own, or I can wait for God to move me out of my comfort zone. Which honestly, he had to do it when it came to this new job anyway. I was looking, but I wasn't doggedly calling these people back. I was resigned to say "Well they need to call ME back. I don't want to overstay my welcome or harrass the HR people." But our financial situation suddenly became extremely dire and I knew I had to get a job or we were going to sink. (Oddly, the same day that I went for my second interview, our financial situation righted itself. It turned out that I'd made a bookkeeping error, entered our cable payment twice, as well as entered some bills that we'd paid off or to which we'd cancelled our subscription.) I'm still nervous. I still feel uneasy. I just... I've had my grandfather on my mind a lot lately. I'm sure I've said it, but he retired from the Air Force and went from Senior Master Sergeant advising a two-star general to the rookie cop when he was 40! Not only that, but he retired as police chief 16 years after that. He was constantly taking me outside of my comfort zone when my brother and I would visit in the summers as we were growing up. We weren't allowed to sit inside all day and watch TV.
I'd never had a scooter, but they bought us each one so we learned to ride. Let me just say that bike riding and scooter riding is so much more fun in Florida than in Tennessee. Although the hills can be fun to ride down, riding up isn't as much fun. And just so many other things. So many things that adults in your life teach you as a child. I want to go back in time a little bit and learn to handle challenges and getting outside of my comfort zone again. It was so much like that during the school years. Every year a new teacher, new subjects. And I excelled at that. I think that's why the school teacher in our training class is so confident. She's in her element when she's faced with change.
I'm rambling at this point. Just kind of throwing thoughts out there as they come to mind. I'm not so good at this conclusions. I guess because the conclusion isn't written. These are my goals. I want to challenge myself more. I want to grow. I especially want to grow and move in a direction toward becoming the person God has in mind for me to be. So we'll see how this goes. I am on a good start. Time for the follow through.
Time to go mark my catalog books for work!
~Jay
ETA I'll start by making an entry that talks about God as a public entry. I usually make these really personal entries friends only. I don't want to offend people and I know that a lot of people think I'm some crazy ultra conservative, maybe even a neo-con, who went all religious. A) I know I'm not. B) Even though I have had a lot of confrontations (and at this point it is nearly 3 years after the fact), I am always surprised by the confrontations C) It's time to stop being Peter in denial and to step out of my comfort zone and say "I am a Christ follower." If you have to unfriend me, I'll understand. I just have to stop trying to hide who I am. I am extremely guilty of going with the crowd when it comes to speaking out of turn. I won't jump off the bridge, but I have been known to say idiotic things just to look cool. Another thing my book is reminding me is that I don't have to worry about impressing anyone other than God. He's the only one I should be worried about impressing. And the provider will give me everything that I need to complete my work.
